The Fab 4some!: Getting to Know AC

My AC there is so much I could say about her. She has the biggest personality I have ever seen in such a little body. She is our free spirited child and a constant contradiction. She loves her dress up clothes and is borderline obsessed with shoes but she can hang with the boys when it comes to playing cars and wrestling all while wearing plastic heels and a tutu. Miss AC was a dream NICU baby, if there is such a thing, she just sailed through her 6 week stay. She progressed so well and even got to be my first baby home. Even though she was only home one day before her sister I think I have about 100 more pictures of her than her siblings because I couldn't believe I finally had a baby home. I kept putting her in her crib, swing, bouncy seat all while snapping pictures of her every movement. Before she came home I had a hard time even walking past the babies bedroom while they were in the NICU. I know that seems strange to some as I remember friends saying to me during their stay at the hospital that they were in the best place for them right now. I get that. I understand that yes these 3lb and 2 lb babies cannot come home at birth. I get that. I knew this is what happens with triplets. they are born early and there isn't anything normal about your pregnancy, birth, or their infancy. It didn't matter. My heart still didn't understand the logic. My brain understood that of course these babies born 10 weeks early cannot come home with their mother but again my heart didn't. Hell my hormones didn't get the message. I read somewhere that after a mother delivers the placenta there is a release of hormones in her body that causes her to have that feeling to nurture this little being and that that high that you feel as you hold your baby is not only the excitement to see this little creature but a chemical reaction. This is where I as a mother whose babies were withheld from her after delivery starts to feel disoriented and confused. All of those books and all of the preparation I thought I had done in hopes that when the delivery of my angels came that I would be able to hold it together flew out the window. I forgot every last bit of that as I laid in recovery by myself. I had told Mr. to leave and go to the NICU with the babies because I wanted to know everything that was going on with them, so off he went and there I laid....alone...empty. This large round belly that I complained constantly about was now hollow and missing the kicks and stretches of those 6 arms and legs. I have never felt so alone in all my life. Looking back I wished I would of had a better plan laid out for myself. I wish I would of asked for my family or someone to stay with me but at the time "I" never crossed my mind...
This is why I need to thank Audrey for coming home first, thank you my sweet little girl for being the first one to fill that empty crib, thank you for being so strong in the NICU so I could see you sleeping in the backseat of the car in your infant carseat. Thank you for finally letting me be one of the many mothers I watched for weeks leaving the hospital with their balloons, flowers, and most importantly their newborns. Thank you Audrey for ending my nightly ritual of tears over my empty house without my babies. Thank you AC for being you.
Audrey is the girl that I wish I was and I admire her so much. She is so tough and strong but so gentle and girly. Around AC first birthday she would be doting on her baby dolls so softly all while sporting 2 black eyes. That image is what I think of when I describe this enchanting little girl. She is going to be able to hang with her brothers all while being her sister's best friend. She is so smart and can follow any sequence you give her which well help her in dance class and when it comes time to build a fort, as i am sure she will do both, and probably on the same day. I cannot wait to watch this amazing little person grow into the women she is going to be, I am truly blessed to be her mother and how God choose me for the job I will never know. He has blessed me with days of wonder and amazement as I watch this beautiful girl grow. What an amazing gift she is to our family she reminds us that there isn't limits to what a girl can do.